Thursday morning, I got a phone call with very sad news. My grandpa had passed away sometime during the night. This was very unexpected to us all because he hadn't been sick other than having a cough. As hard and sad as it was to hear that he was no longer here, it was at least good to know that he hadn't suffered and wasn't in a hospital hooked up to machines. He was home. In his own bed. He simply went to sleep and drifted into Heaven. And honestly, if we got to choose our death, isn't that the way we want it to be? I know I would.
As the news made it's way to family and friends in states across the country, travel plans were made and relatives started arriving the next day. It was all bitter-sweet. Like one big family reunion (which hasn't happened in over a decade...pathetic, I know), but we were all gathered to say good-bye to someone we loved so much. And all I could think about is how much he would have loved to see us all. His house was full with over 30 relatives!
The following days were spent with my grandma as much as possible. Helping eat all the food that so many generous people had been bringing to her. Looking through pictures of my grandpa's life and recalling memories we had of him. Planning the memorial service. Visitation at the funeral home. The weekend was pack full, but it all seemed so surreal.
At the memorial service on Monday, we sang his favorite hymn "To God Be The Glory", watched a wonderful photo slide show with so many great snapshots of his life and then the family members also had an opportunity to share memories they had of grandpa. I had offered to do this a couple days before hand, but wasn't sure if I would be able to make it through reading what I had written to share. Seeing my cousins cry as we watched pictures of his life and sitting next to my brother as he cried did not make it any easier. I did manage to read what I had written. It was so fun getting to hear the memories that everyone else had to share and be able to laugh at some of the silly things about grandpa.
Savannah was grandpa's first great-grandchild and his only great-grand daughter. My cousin, Stephanie, had a little boy in October which was his only great-grandson. I am so thankful that grandpa lived close to us and was able to see Savannah and love on her as much as possible. He was able to see her for all the family gatherings, birthday celebrations and holidays. Although it was only a little over six months that he got to be here with her, those six months meant so much to me! And one day, when Savannah is older, I'll show her all the pictures of him holding her and the videos of him loving on her.
The selfish side of me is so, so sad that he won't be here to see her grow and learn new things. And I've wished a thousand times that I could just give him one more big hug and tell him how much I love him. But I know that he is in the best place there is, and if our simple minds could come close to grasping how amazing that eternal life is going to be, we would all wish to be there now rather than wishing him to be back on this sinful, painful earth. I am so happy to know that he loved the Lord and that I will be seeing him again. So, rather than saying "good-bye", I'll say "See ya soon, grandpa!"
Oh, Amy. This made me cry so hard. But those two pictures are beautiful. And so is this post. Thanks for writing it. It still is sooo surreal.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you liked the post. It was hard for me to write, but I wanted to have it to read again one day. It still doesn't seem real to me either.
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